Category: Mental Health

Let’s be honest, we tend to ignore our negative feelings. Most people are only okay to share when things are going well. But, if you continue to suppress your feelings, it can have long term effects. If you continue to avoid your negative feelings, it will come out in other ways. It is best to acknowledge your feelings, seek therapy or a mentor, and understand the why behind your feelings.

Acknowledge Your Feelings

Guess what? There are so many labels for feelings besides happiness, anger, and sadness. Learn how to name your feelings and give yourself time to process them. When you can acknowledge your feelings, then you can move past them. When you ignore your true feelings, you will begin to express them in unhealthy ways without realizing it.

Seek Therapy or a Mentor

Therapy is a great way to express all feelings without judgment. Our friends and family can only give so much support and usually give a bias opinion. A therapist is a neutral party that can give you clarity on your overall mental health.

Secondly, mentors are great sounding boards as well. So, find someone in your career field or someone you truly admire to give you guidance. Honestly, some of the most insightful people in your life are the ones that can share their lowest valleys and highest peaks without reservations.

Understand the Why

Did you know that your feelings can be a thermometer for your mental health? Feelings give you a mental health temperature. The therapist will ask certain questions that make you stop and think. Sometimes, we get so busy that we do not stop to reflect on what we are feeling and why.

If you do not find the why behind the feelings, it will be difficult to move past your negative feelings. Once you recognize your triggers, you can begin to develop healthier behavior patterns.

Conclusion

When I started acknowledging all of my thoughts and feelings, I became more emotionally regulated. When you do the inner work on yourself, then you will be able to hold space for others to express their feelings as well. We live in a society where people struggle to hold space for people when they are going through a hard time such as death, miscarriages, and divorce. Lastly, expressing negative feelings does not mean that you are being negative. If means that your are being truthful.

Hope this Helps,

Dominique Duarte

Refer to How to Become Self-Aware: https://www.bydominiqueduarte.com/how-to-become-self-aware/

Book Referral: https://www.amazon.com/Living-Life-Balance-Spiritual-Performance-ebook/dp/B0BC4PJ3SK

How do you process your negative thoughts and feelings? Comment Below

Walking in your purpose can be overwhelming, especially if you have not seen the fruit of your labor. Many times I have derailed my progress and gotten in my own way due to a lack of faith. Living in fear is holding you back so begin to persevere, feel your feelings, be patient and grateful to walk in your purpose wholeheartedly.

Persevere

When you are walking in your purpose, you will be knocked down. Some people think that if you are truly walking in your purpose that doors will just open and there will be no adversity at all. However, this is not the case. No matter what you do in life, there will be some level of adversity. If you know that you are walking in your purpose, then you have to persevere through the trials. Sometimes, you will fail multiple times, but please keep going on your journey. You got this!

Feel All of Your Feelings

“If you are knocked down, don’t stay down, get back up.” You probably hear this saying all the time and many interpret that as feel nothing along the way to getting back up. You will feel anger, sadness, joy, happiness, frustration and possibly some depression when walking in your purpose. Feeling your feelings is not a problem as long as you do not hurt anyone in the process. Instead of using food, drugs, alcohol, or cigarettes to numb your feelings, actually feel and process them. This will take time. Processing your emotions will give you the momentum to keep walking in your purpose.

Be Patient & Grateful

God works in His own timing or the universe works in its’ own timing, whichever you believe. However, it is challenging to believe this when waiting for your own ship to come in. Celebrate the small wins, ALL of them and be grateful for every single one. If you are grateful for the little things, then you will have a more positive outlook on your situation, even during the difficult periods.

The wins may be far and in between at times, but it is a part of the process. When God or the universe feels you are ready for more, He or it will open more doors, but every step that you take is preparing you for the bigger picture in the future. Be patient with yourself and know that you are worthy of greatness, and only you are meant to walk this particular path, so be diligent and grateful along the journey no matter how long it takes.

Conclusion

Persevere, feel all your feelings, be patient and grateful and you will continue to walk in your purpose with joy in your heart. Success is not immediate and it may not ever look the way you or other people thought that it would, but when your life has purpose, it is truly beautiful and worth all of the difficulties along the way.

Hope this Helps,

Dominique Duarte

Genius Zone: The Breathrough Process to End Negative Thinking and Live in True Creativity by Gay Hendricks: https://www.amazon.com/Genius-Zone-Breakthrough-Negative-Creativity/dp/B08PW4QGD5

https://www.bydominiqueduarte.com/how-to-wait-patiently/

What is emotional intelligence? Mental Health America defines emotional intelligence as the ability to manage your emotions and understand the emotions of others. You can increase your emotional intelligence by reading non-fiction books, writing in a journal, and self-reflecting.

Read Non-Fiction Books

Reading is fundamental. The more you read, the more you grow mentally, emotionally, and spiritually. Yes, you can read fiction books too. However, non-fiction books, such as self-help books, or biographies, can give you insights that will lead to personal growth. If you do not like reading books, listen to audiobooks or podcasts instead. If you want to improve your life, reading is a solid way to do this.

Journal

Journaling is cathartic and a way to release all of your thoughts and feelings on paper. If you would like to journal daily that would be wonderful, but you do not have to journal daily. I journal whenever, but I can still refer back to old journal entries from years ago and reflect. Go back and read your past journal entries to see how much you have grown overtime during difficult times. As long as you are better than the person you were yesterday, you are doing well my friend.

Self-Reflect

Consistently self-reflect when things are going well and when things are crashing down. If you compare yourself to the person that you used to be, you will be able to measure your personal growth overall. Therapy, reading self-help books and journaling have given me the gift of self-awareness. Self-awareness is a powerful tool to aid yourself, become fully present, and empathetic to those around you.

Conclusion

So, increasing your emotional intelligence can make you more empathetic, more self-aware, and more authentic. When you do the inner work, you can truly be a light for everyone else around you. In conclusion, reading non-fiction books, journaling, and self-reflecting will give you the steps to developing your true authentic self.

Hope this helps,

Dominique Duarte

https://www.bydominiqueduarte.com/

https://www.amazon.com/How-Win-Friends-Influence-People/dp/0671027034

Complex PTSD: From Surviving to Thriving by Pete Walker: https://www.amazon.com/Complex-PTSD-Surviving-RECOVERING-CHILDHOOD/dp/1492871842

Can’t Hurt Me by David Goggins: https://www.amazon.com/Cant-Hurt-Me-Master-Your/dp/1544512287

Happiness for Humankind Playbook by Aymee Coget: https://www.amazon.com/HAPPINESS-HUMANKIND-PLAYBOOK-Sustainable-Happiness/dp/0578222019

John Bradshaw The Family Series https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GjAw1M2thMk&list=PL4wA21d2cgvEoCnGkVBFG-RrQA-qGxaD-&index=1

Emotional abuse causes a gradual erosion of a person’s self esteem, confidence, and self-worth. Low self-esteem and low self-worth create issues at school, work, and personal relationships well into adulthood. In order to begin overcoming emotional abuse, begin therapy, read self-help books, journal, acknowledge the abuse, and self-reflect regularly.

Begin Therapy

Therapy is beneficial for everyone and can be a great tool for personal growth in all areas of your life. Since growth takes time, you should attend therapy for an extended period of time. Furthermore, you may not click with every therapist so shop around. If someone is not a good fit for you, do not give up on therapy, just find a therapist that works for you.

Read Self-Help Books

Since 2013, I have read self-help books or personal development books. I read several books a year. Reading self-help books, along with therapy has aided in my healing from emotional abuse. Consider reading the following: Complex PTSD From Surviving to Thriving by Pete Walker; Can’t Hurt Me by David Goggins; How to Win Friends and Influence People by Dale Carnegie; The Art of Letting Go by Nick Trenton, What Happened to You by Oprah Winfrey and Dr. Bruce D. Perry.

Journal

Journaling is cathartic and a way to release all of your thoughts and feelings on paper. If you would like to journal daily that would be wonderful, but you do not have to journal daily. I journal whenever, but I can still refer back to old journal entries from years ago and reflect. Go back and read your past journal entries to see how much you have grown overtime during difficult times. As long as you are better than the person you were yesterday, you are doing well my friend.

Acknowledge the Abuse

When I think of my childhood, there are mixed feelings for sure. My mother and stepfather provided a great life for me with a nice home, clothes, and plenty of food to eat. However, it has taken years to acknowledge that I lived in a verbally and emotionally abusive household from childhood until I moved to NYC in 2016.

Acknowledging the abuse does not mean that you cannot forgive your parents. It does not mean that your parents were not good people. I have forgiven my parents and I know that they tried the best that they could. However, the effects of living in that environment for 26 years has left it’s mark in signficant ways that are hard to ignore. The body really does keep the score and self-regulating is still a daily struggle.

The Body Keeps the Score by Dr. Bessel von der Kolk: https://www.amazon.com/Body-Keeps-Score-Healing-Trauma/dp/0143127748

Self-Reflect Regularly

My dear barbie, you have come along way. Consistently self-reflect when things are going well and when things are crashing down. If you compare yourself to the person that you used to be, you will be able to measure your personal growth overall. Therapy, reading self-help books and journaling have given me the gift of self-awareness. Self-awareness is a powerful tool to aid yourself, become fully present, and empathetic to those around you.

Conclusion

Adulthood is no joke and no one is fully equipped to take on this thing called life. But, if you endured verbal, emotional, physical, or sexual abuse, you will be disregulated as an adult. Until you work on healing, you will consistently self-sabotage in big ways or more subtle ways. A traumatized adult raises traumatized children unless they begin to heal. Lastly, therapy is not a judgment on your sanity, it is a tool that creates a better you so that you can show up in the world as a fully functioning adult.

https://www.newharbinger.com/9781626251700/adult-children-of-emotionally-immature-parents/

https://www.bydominiqueduarte.com/

This past year was truly a test. I went through three teacher assistant positions in less than a year. For the past five years, I have been trying to work in education so that I could have some stability, but it has caused more harm than good in my life.

In 2025, I am taking charge of my life and putting 100 percent toward my singing and acting career. Yes, I have been a consistent part-time performer and occassional full-time performer since 2013, but I have never gone full throttle. In order to take charge of your life, make a S.M.A.R.T plan, give 100 percent effort, take action, and commit.

Make a S.M.A.R.T Plan

If you do not have a plan, you will not reach your goals. Create a plan that is SMART, specific, measurable, attainable, relevant, and timely. When your goals are not attainable or if you give yourself a rigid timeline, this can lead to you getting discouraged with yourself. Push yourself, but be realistic as well.

Give 100% Effort

Ask yourself, “Have I given my best effort toward my goal?” There is no question that I work hard, but have I been giving 100 percent in my performance career? The honest answer is “No.” I have not been as committed as I could have been the past 12 years. When you figure out your purpose, go all in. Do not work half-heartedly when you are called for a purpose that can also help other people too.

Take Action

You have a plan, now take action. This is probably why most people do not accomplish their goals. Either people are taking little to no action at all or taking actions that are not in alignment with the goals they have set. This requires some discipline so I would suggest reading Atomic Habits by Jame Clear in order to begin new habits that will change your life.

https://jamesclear.com/atomic-habits

COMMIT

Confidence comes when you do what you say you will do. Most of the time, I do what I say I will do, but if I were more consistent, my self-esteem and self-respect would be higher. When you make a decision commit to the decision and make it apart of your identity. You are now a person who only engages in certain behaviors and does not engage in other behaviors. You decide what those behaviors will be, but when you do decide, you must COMMIT.

Hope this helps,

Dominique Duarte

https://www.bydominiqueduarte.com/

I had maintained a healthy weight most of my life, but my thirties have been a different story. Remaining thin does not equal healthy eating. I am the prime example of that. My relationship with food has always been unhealthy. I viewed it as a comfort, a friend, and a stress reliever. However, I have made more progress with my food challenges the last few years, and I hope to reach my goal weight by February or March. When dealing with a food addiction, log your Meals, plan all of your meals, get some physical activity daily and give yourself grace.

Log Your Meals

Keeping a food diary can be key to long term weight loss. When you are addicted to food, you overeat without realizing it. So use a journal or notebook to log every single thing that you eat every day. The best way to log meals and excercise is to use the My Fitness Pal app or website. My Fitness Pal is the easiest way to log your meals because it can give you the most accurate calorie readings for almost anything that you eat no matter where you eat.

https://www.myfitnesspal.com/

Cancel Food Delivery Services

If you are addicted to food, using doordash, ubereats, or grubhub can tempt you to overeat more frequently. Deleting them will make it harder for you to access high calorie foods more frequently. When you do go out to eat, walk or drive to go get the food. This decision will make it more likely that you will eat at home more often and eat out less. But if you want to keep these services, you can limit how much you will use them.

Get Some Physical Activity Daily

You have to move your body regularly whether you want to maintain or lose weight. I walk almost everyday and this has helped me lose weight. If you want to go to the gym to tone up, great, but walking is quite effective. I combined the walking with logging my meals consistently and the weight came off. However, be patient if you only choose to walk. If you want quicker weight loss results, the gym may be the way to go.

Give Yourself Grace

If you have a food addiction, do not be discouraged. You can do this. Make small changes and you will see results. The results just may not be as quick as you thought. If you mess up on your daily calories, just reset the next day. Be Patient with yourself! Weight loss does take time and may take longer than you anticipate. Read Atomic Habits by James Clear to help on your weight loss journey.

Hope this helps,

Dominique Duarte

https://www.bydominiqueduarte.com/

https://www.noom.com/lose-weight/